Weird. Shopping.

Because it was pouring rain on this Día de las Culturas (I don't believe in celebrating "Columbus Day" - click here to find out why), I decided to go to the mall and walk around there since I couldn't walk outside.

It was awesome, but weird.

I shopped at Express, The Limited, Gap, and New York & Company, all places I used to dream of shopping when I was in high school. I was wearing sweaters in size Large. I tried on a cute sweater dress in Large. Some of the XLs were too big. I believe I could have gotten into a Medium in some of Gap's sweaters; they seemed to run big.

How weird is this, though? I used to wear 3Xs and 4Xs. Six months ago, I was deep into 2X. Now, I'm not necessarily "extra" anything. It was a disorienting experience.

I should note that I can really only wear the Larges in forgiving fabrics and sweaters. I am not a firm size Large yet, even on top. For skirts, I'm not even close.

One of the strangest things is how I felt nervous entering each store, just like when I was fatter and accompanying a friend to those stores. I would either closely follow my friend around or make a beeline for the accessories. This, I thought, would let the salespeople know that I wasn't under the impression that they had clothes in my size. I stood outside some of the stores today for a few minutes before I walked in, smoothing any apprehensiveness. Oddly, I can shop in those places now, and I get the same spiel as the other customers--they tell me about sales, fitting rooms . . . they treat me normally, even though I do not feel entitled to that.

I worked up the nerve to walk inside Ann Taylor LOFT, but I didn't try on anything. The salespeople weren't as nice. I wanted to go to White House/Black Market because I've always loved their aesthetic, but the salesguy there looked kind of angry. I honestly thought he might tell me I was too fat to shop there. I will try those places again in 20 pounds!

Note: I didn't buy anything. By "shopping," I mean trying on clothes and then putting them back. I will primarily be purchasing at Ross and Tar-zhay until I reach goal!